Many people have discussed the impact Doctor Beard has had on the animal kingdom. Wild rumours in the media of essentially “Dr Doolittle” abilities were quashed early in their development, but there remains continuing speculation regarding his research into the hierarchical structure of various animal communities.

Whilst research into the specific psychological and sociological behaviour of animals is by no means a new development, the research of Doctor Beard is rarely carried out without considerable public interest. What’s more, interesting results have been discovered already, and the media is once again beginning to pick up on this area, claiming that it will be the next psychological revolution to come from the Doctor’s golden career.

The recent commotion centres around the Doctor’s disregard for unobtrusive study. He has long been known to disapprove of those who simply observe, rather than mould behaviour for the better. Indeed, many close colleagues of the Doctor claim to have watched him ‘teaching’ rodents traditionally human leadership traits. For example, reports of rudimentary territorial diplomacy between rival families of mice are likely to be confirmed at the Doctor’s fourth quarter public address.

Whilst undoubtedly remarkable, the public imagination is more captivated by the recently well publicised rumours of a final settlement being made between all carnivore, omnivore and herbivore animals of the Serengeti to live in peace. Undoubtedly the work of Doctor Beard, this cease-fire (fragile as it may be) represents a major breakthrough and will no doubt reap plentiful rewards for the famous psychologist.

As ever, these rumours could easily be confirmed or denied in a single press conference, but Doctor Beard’s trademark stubbornness has once again reared its head, forcing an eager world to wait in breathless anticipation.

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